some infinities are smaller than others
by starlight.moon.princess
Summary: "They are meant for infinity, and as she loses consciousness, she finds herself feeling glad she had the chance to experience even the smallest part of it with Aleksis." :: Sasha, Aleksis, and living the infinity you have. :: Non-linear


_**for brie, because you're wonderful for being my pacific rim buddy **_

~ s_ome infinities are smaller than others ~_

She falls in love with the machine the as soon as she sees it. She knows nothing about, but she already knows it's _theirs_.

The first thing they are told about Cherno Alpha is that it is a Mark I Jaeger.

* * *

When they are relocated to Hong Kong, she smiles at Aleksis.

"We have it better than the others," she says. "We still get to jump inside a Jaeger."

He looks at her doubtfully. Hong Kong is not his idea of paradise. But she is happy, so he doesn't say a word.

* * *

She is twenty-seven when they tell her she's ill. She has spent three years piloting a Mark I Jaeger, and no matter how much it has been refurbished, nothing can change the fact that it was never meant to protect its pilots from radioactivity.

They keep her away from the front lines for a year.

* * *

She meets Aleksis Kaidonovsy at the Academy.

She is out of place there, a twenty-four year old woman in the middle of barely legal boys and girls.

But the moment the first Jaeger thundered across her television screen, she had known that that was what she was meant to do with her life.

If it means getting inside a Jaeger, she doesn't mind being the odd one out.

* * *

"Aleksandra Yurieva, meet Aleksis Kaidonovsky."

In the four years since they last crossed paths, Aleksis has grown up. He is no longer the child she remembers, but a full grown man in his own right.

Four years ago, she would never have been able to imagine herself fighting besides a boy six years younger than her. But Aleksis has grown up, and so has she.

* * *

The doctor tells her that she will lose her hair.

Radiation treatments, he tells her. No matter how much humanity has progressed, they still remain her only option.

* * *

She is bald the first time she straps herself in besides Aleksis.

It's unusual, the fact that the two of them are going on mission before going through a trial run of the Drift. Putting two minds that are unused to each other in front of a Level 2 Kaiju is certainly dangerous.

But there is no other team that can hope to get to the Shatterdome before Vladivostok is destroyed, so untested or not, the job falls to them.

* * *

As the water rushes in, the only thing she allows herself to focus on is Aleksis' mind in hers.

For the first time since they became partners, they chase they R.A.B.I.T together.

* * *

Alexis' dyes his hair so that she's not the only one who looks stupid.

When her hair starts to grow back, his is still dyed that stupid shade of American-blond.

She dyes her hair to match his, and they vow to remove it together, and not a moment before.

* * *

The cancer leaves lasting effects even when it goes into remission.

She's not supposed to step into a Jaeger dating before the Mark IIIs. Cherno Alpha may have been modified enough to be acceptable for Aleksis, but her body is much more susceptible to the radiation than his will ever be.

But Cherno Alpha is their machine, and that is something Sasha knows Aleksis can feel as well. She will not be swayed. She knows that there is only a very slim chance that the two of them will survive to see the end of the war.

If they do, they will face the consequences of her actions then. If not – and that is the more likely choice – at least they will have died completely content.

* * *

LOCCENT tells them that they were in the Drift for eighteen hours.

It is a time that has never been reached by any other pair of Rangers around the world. The closest to their mark had been couple of Indian pilots – a husband and wife – who had reached six hours.

Once upon a time, that would have made Aleksandra Yurieva very happy. But LOCCENT and their news comes second to what she has found in that record Drift.

It is impossible to spend an extended period of time in another's mind without knowing everything about them.

She is no longer Aleksandra, the hard warrior she sees in the mirror every day, but Sasha, the beautiful, delicate woman of steel that Aleksis thinks of her as.

Somewhere in those eighteen hours, she has taught herself more about Aleksis Kaidonovsy than any other man who has ever entered her mind.

It is impossible not to fall in love with him, the eager young man who remembers her from the Academy, the battle-trained soldier who still nurses the feelings for her, his first love.

* * *

They die together, just like she has always wanted for them.

Jaeger pilots shouldn't be made to survive the death of their partner, and she is glad that neither one of them will have to face that.

The water fills the Conn-Pod, and Aleksis' mind pulls her towards the R.A.B.I.T

* * *

They exchange rings a month after their first Drift.

She is the happiest she has ever been, and somewhere in her mind, she knows he feels the same way.

She doesn't know it yet, but she'll never have any chance to feel any less than she does on the she leaves Aleksandra Yurieva behind and becomes Sasha Kaidonovsky.

* * *

They are meant for infinity, and as she loses consciousness, she finds herself feeling glad she had the chance to experience even the smallest part of it with Aleksis.

* * *

**I hope you guys liked it! Please don't forget to drop a review on your way out c:**


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